Ex-Husbandisms

Have you ever had that moment where you ask yourself,

“Who am I? How did I get here? Is this really all there is? When is the last time I focused on what makes me happy?”

So let me be the one to ask you, Are you happy with your life and who you have become?

If that answer is yes- then read no further- well done and keep on clicking along!  

However, if that answer is no, then you have to ask yourself these 3 very important questions:

• Is my life, and my actions that of others OR designed by me?  

• Do you have the job that you want or the job that you think your parents or your spouse wants you to have?  

• Look at your clothes- are you wearing what you want or what you think the other parents at the PTA will approve of.

I had this moment in my life where I was able to take an outside and objective view and quickly realized that I was being heavily and unfairly influenced by other people- my spouse, my kids, my co-workers, my parents and the list goes on.  I wasn’t living MY authentic life.

Living an authentic life is one of the main tenets of living a fulfilling and peaceful life.  It’s important to understand what authenticity looks like, and it is completely different from one person to the next.  There is no absolute mold or model to subscribe to. There are guidelines and ways to help you on your way to living an authentic life and here are a few that have helped me on my journey.

1.     Being Intentional and Focused with my Time and Actions- I pay very close attention to where I invest my time and energy.  I don’t do the things that I previously felt obligated to do out of guilt (i.e. my friend’s kids athletic events, extended family luncheons, the late night run to the grocery store).  I now make conscious decisions on my day to day activities.

2.     I also make it a point to check in with myself constantly and ask myself, - How do I feel? Living an authentic life means doing things that make me feel good, and often.

3.     Having more Fun-  Yes!  Fun! We’ve been told and praised for working super hard and long hours.  We have to leave room for more fun in our lives. When you allow and invite fun into your life, things that were previously difficult become much easier.  You laugh more, you’re less stressed, your health improves- need I say more?

These are just highlights and there are many more.  I have come to realize that life is a dance- the music is constantly changing and you’ve got to adjust your steps to keep up.  You may be doing the waltz when life is peaceful or sometimes breakdancing when your 3 children have 3 activities scheduled at the same time and you’re trying to figure out logistics.  The important thing to remember is to keep dancing, you don’t want the music to stop. Make your life a symphony.